Marital research shows that 69% of conflicts amongst couples are perpetual.*
They are simply not resolvable.
They will never go away.
Statistics also show that 70% of co-founder relationships fail (and therefore the company).
The overlap in percentages suggests that those co-founders are simply giving up in the face of perpetual conflict.
A reason not to partner up in the first place?
Or rather is this perpetual conflict a healthy sign of two independent human beings with all their individual wants, needs and habits?
Of course there will be clashes….
The key therefore is to manage these “perpetual” issues in a constructive, respectful and positive environment.
To allow differences and learn from them.
To shift from a negative perspective of difference and conflict to a mindset of it being natural and indeed generative.
To fully allow that two people can have different ways of seeing things and that both can be right.
Take a look at the picture below.
What do you see?
Your mind will instantly leap to either an old lady or a young woman.
Even when you manage to see the other image your mind will keep going back to the image that you naturally see.
So hold this thought in your head: your partner might see one thing and you might see the other.
Neither is wrong.
Appreciate that, and you are on your way to managing and honouring those perpetual conflicts in a respectful, positive way.
PS For an insight into the journey I take my co-founders on to learn to manage their perpetual conflicts keep reading below.
*The Gottman Institute